Self-Doubt

Top: Zara (similar here and here); Jeans: Topshop; Shoes: Zara (similar here and here)

Now more than ever, it’s near impossible to spend 15 minutes on the internet without reading about how Instagram creates a false version of reality. As a content creator, I firmly believe that Instagram is my way of showing life through rose-coloured lenses. I have never misled you guys to believe that my life is all glamor 24/7 – it’s not. A beautiful food picture is the result of a cold meal, and those swoon-worthy travel photos are taken at the ass-crack of dawn. You get the idea.

Of course, as someone in the industry, I’m more immune to the ‘shininess’ of Instagram than a regular person. It’s hard to elude someone who knows the grind that goes into every single beautiful picture. However, as content creators, our struggle with social media is a little different.

Lately, I’ve been dealing with overstimulation and wanting it all. Allow me to clarify. We are constantly exposed to our peers doing incredible things. Except in this case, I consider my peers to be everyone who makes a living out of content creation. And while I’m perfectly aware of the fact that X person’s life is not what it seems in pictures, it’s so easy to constantly nitpick what you’re doing wrong. To constantly brainstorm ways to improve and worry that you’re falling behind until it becomes completely all-consuming.

So when I feel myself going down this rabbit hole, I have to actively slap myself back to reality, force myself to get off social media and do something else. While I thought about making this a ‘tips and tricks’ post on what I do to overcome self-doubt and comparison to others, I decided against it. The reason being that I myself haven’t figured out a fool-proof way to overcome this problem quite yet, and I don’t want to pretend like I have. And, most importantly, I think it’s important to share our human side once in a while.

Do you ever fall into the trap of wanting it all and comparing yourself to others? How do you deal with it?

Photography by Erin Leydon

Follow:
Share:

27 Comments

  1. May 31, 2017 / 11:48 am

    Obsessed with this cool look Siffat! That top is amazing. I do struggle with comparing myself. I get off social media on weekend and that helps put things in perspective.

    http://www.kathrineeldridge.com

  2. May 31, 2017 / 11:56 am

    Gorgeous look. Those sleeves are lovely. I find myself struggling when it comes to comparison via social media, the best thing to do is not constantly being on the phone but it’s kinda hard.

    Nathalie
    http://www.nathalie-alexandra.blogspot.com

  3. May 31, 2017 / 1:22 pm

    I adore this look and I can totally relate to your post! It’s hard to avoid those feelings and I’ve come to the conclusion that all the emotional ups and downs are part of the territory. So we can only aim to become stronger and better to rise above our own self-doubt. Thanks for sharing! Xoxo

  4. May 31, 2017 / 1:34 pm

    First of all that top is amazing 2nd I can totally relate! I sometimes struggle to juggle it all, especially instagram and my personal life which as you know has been very up and down. So when I find myself comparing to other igers and their posts and their life I try to remember we are ALL human and no one is perfect and I take a social media break every now and then which helps alot… your insta is gorgeous though, keep it up babe! 🙂 xx

  5. May 31, 2017 / 2:35 pm

    This outfit is so stylish! Love that top babe. And yes, I think most of us can relate on some level. And it’s hard to find a balance of appreciating people’s content but also keep in mind that that’s now what their life looks like. I think it’s always a good idea to avoid IG on days you’re feeling low though, other people’s look of a perfected life won’t help. Allow yourself to be inspired when you feel like it and stay away when you’re not really in the mood! Xx

    http://www.thefashionfolks.com

  6. May 31, 2017 / 3:19 pm

    I used to compare myself to other creators so much! It really used make me feel bad about not having the perfect feed, life and what not. I now only compare myself to myself and make sure that I’m better than I was yesterday. Now I look at other creators and admire their work and get inspired by them. Sounds cliché I know, but it really does work.

    xo | Cindy Elena
    http://www.boringclothes.com

  7. May 31, 2017 / 4:04 pm

    First off, that top is amazeballs!!

    Second, i totally agree with. Social media is the worst, and I can’t imagine having gone through highschool or even collage and having to deal with it. I know that everyone’s life isn’t perfect, but who’s going highlight those little insecurities, days we have breakouts, times we’re feeling bummed out and just wanna sit in our jammies all day on the couch. Because it’s not really ‘likeable’ content.
    I haven’t found any tips or tricks to deal with it. Because every time I open instagram and see a photo of alexis ren or a bad-ass blogger I start thinking “I WANT, I WANT, I WANT…”

    It’s a tough world in social media

    http://www.luellapearl.com
    Caitlin

  8. May 31, 2017 / 5:57 pm

    I love how you styled this black look with the cutest gold shoes!
    This topic is so relevant for me right now! I keep comparing myself to others on how to improve and ‘get it all’ as you mention.
    It is hard in this business since everyone wants the same thing. We just have to remember what we have when Instagram is not there?! Without social media who are we as people?
    Thank you for always being you and being such a great inspiration!

  9. June 1, 2017 / 12:15 am

    I feel you girl, I find myself constantly doubting. It is so not healthy and there is no need to do it. We are all incredible individuals, it’s what makes us us… we are different.

    I loved this post babe, and I love you

    Filipa xxx
    PlayingWithApparel.com | Instagram

  10. June 1, 2017 / 7:54 am

    I totally relate to this post! I think Instagram can be very negative because we can’t stop compare to each other when we see the most beautiful pictures from other gorgeous girls! Now, I’m trying to follow only inspirational account and telling myself it’s just inspo and I’m trying to stop comparing myself to others.

    http://violettedaily.com

  11. June 1, 2017 / 9:48 am

    Love this look! Beautiful pictures! And when it comes to comparing yourself with others, one can only live their life at their pace and do what is practically possible to bring out the best in one’s work. And that’s what makes one different from the others. Everyone has their own journey. And to not succumb to the pressure of social media, might be one of the ways to not let yourself fall in the trap.
    You’re doing some great work. Keep them coming!
    xx
    Naznin
    http://www.idressfortheapplause.com

  12. Zeynab
    June 1, 2017 / 10:48 am

    I totally agree. I am feeling the same way at the amount, I am taking so time out from social media.I love your hair so beautiful.

    Zeynab x
    The Beauty Load

  13. June 1, 2017 / 1:47 pm

    First off, you look incredibly beautiful and chic; I adore that top! As for self doubt and compassion, I can very much relate to this. I think we can become hard on ourselves when we know the amount of time, effort, and pure dedication we put into our work only to feel as though it’s not being rewarded as we feel it should be, WHEN we feel it should be. I don’t think there is any real way to overcome this feeling because I think it’s a human reaction everyone experiences, I’m sure even celebrities feel the same way; why did she get the role and I didn’t? Or why did she land the cover and I didn’t? What I think we can remind ourselves is that someone else’s progress doesn’t mean that we’re doing something wrong, it may not be our season quite yet and somewhere out there, someone is thinking the very same thing about us and our success, too! Thanks for brining up such a relevant topic and I hope you’re having a wonderful week so far, beauty!

    XO,

    Jalisa
    http://www.thestylecontour.com

  14. miri
    June 1, 2017 / 2:38 pm

    Hi sweetie, I felt the same several weeks ago but thanks to my husband and my daughter I realized that I have to live my life, be grateful for what I have and stop comparing myself to 18-year-olds who have more free time and no family.
    It is hard sometimes because I can’t go to events every night nor am I free during the day when I am at work. So I have to do my best with what I have.
    I also decided to change focus of my blog a bit so that it reflects who I am and that I am a mother. I want to add some DIY articles because that is what I like to do besides fashion, beauty and personal style. So I am working on it. Instead of looking outside and filling my mind with what others are doing, I will look inside and listen to myself.
    X
    Miri

    http://currentlywearing.com

  15. June 1, 2017 / 2:42 pm

    I totally relate to this post. It is so hard not to look at people’s partnerships too sometimes and wondering “hey, I worked with that PR company too. I feel like I would be totally good for this partnership. How come they got the deal but I didn’t?”
    At the end of the day, PR companies have their own way of thinking and this shouldn’t ever influence the way we see and create our contents. If they want to work with us, thats great. If they don’t, thats great too. At the end of the day you know you are creating content that is 100% you and that you can stand behind!

    -Didier
    http://www.didieryhc.com

  16. June 1, 2017 / 6:24 pm

    I couldn’t agree more. Social media is a major reason for us, infact most of the teenagers to feel less worthy, to start comparing themselves to others peers and seeing others lives better than them. This is a human nature. One thing that I do is get off from social channels and spend some alone times doing various activities. It does help me to things into pieces. 🙂

    Love,
    Manavi
    http://www.beforbeauty.com

  17. June 1, 2017 / 6:29 pm

    Agree 100%. It took a long time but I finally was able to create an inner dialogue that was strong enough to help me ignore what other people are doing and not be so caught up in social media and other people’s highlight reels. And by a long time I mean years and by ignore what other people are doing I mean 99% of the time (I’m only human, after all). Love this post and topic and appreciate the insight into the “shininess” of content creation!

    xx, Amy
    http://www.theluxilook.com

  18. June 1, 2017 / 6:52 pm

    Love the shoes! And gorgeous top.

    ephemeralfox.blogspot.com

  19. June 1, 2017 / 8:06 pm

    Great post- this is definitely an issue I think a lot of us face. And as many comments have stated, the only thing we can do is to focus on producing our best work, take breaks to enjoy real life, and move forward with our vision.

    White Silk, Black Leather
    http://www.whitesilkblackleather.com

  20. June 1, 2017 / 9:10 pm

    These days it’s so easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others. I’m guilty of doing that. However, I try to remember that comparison is the thief of joy and I should be proud of what I’ve achieved.

    Her Hive

  21. June 2, 2017 / 10:29 pm

    You look great! Interesting post! I think people need to understand that these are just photos, someone’s creative work, and it doesn’t necessarily tell the story of anyone’s life. I look at social media in the blogging community as motivation or getting inspiration, not to compare myself because I like being different. Thanks for sharing!
    http://www.comfycozyup.com

  22. June 3, 2017 / 3:51 am

    Self doubt is something I really struggle with. I try and remember that my worth isn’t tied up in what society thinks of me. You look so chic and edgy in black, Siffat <3

    Blessings,
    Edye | http://gracefulcoffee.com

  23. June 7, 2017 / 9:21 am

    I absolutely agree with you dear, most of the time when I see successful bloggers I felt envy and comparing myself to them and keep asking why’s and what if. Nevertheless, I am still happy with my own way. Happy to know, that despite of everything still there are people loves my way. Great post! Thanks for sharing!

    Oppss.. by the way, I love your photos and your outfit.

    xoxo,
    Hope you could drop by to my blog too