7 Things I Wish I was Taught in School

Pants: Zara (similar); Jacket: Zara (similar here and here); Boots: Alexander Wang

This past month has been filled with a lot of nostalgia for me. While in London, I grabbed dinner with one of my best friends, and we began to discuss high school, which was a serious trip down memory lane. Then, after returning to Toronto, I walked through University of Toronto to get to dinner one night, and couldn’t believe that it had been 5 years since I sat in my last undergrad class.

My high school experience was one that perhaps a lot of people can relate to. It was filled with ups and downs. I learned as early as high school that I had the ability to do anything I set my mind to, and developed my tenacity back then. I’m also grateful for some of the lifelong friendships I was able to cement. That being said, I don’t miss high school one bit. In fact, I could not have been more excited to leave high school and go to college.

University, on the other hand, was a time where I thrived. I loved the fact that there was no pressure to ‘fit in’, and be part of one clique. I loved the breadth of classes that were offered, the endless number of extracurriculars and, of course, how beautiful my campus was. However, reflecting back, I can’t help but realize how ill-equipped I was for real life despite my education.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m extremely grateful for what I did learn in both high school and university. So much of who I am can be credited to my education. But despite how much I learned academically, I feel like I missed being educated in real life matters, which I’m hoping changes for the next generation. So here are 7 things I wish I was taught in school:

Finances
If anything has thrown me for a loop, it’s been finances. Sure, I know the basics, like never spending beyond my means, but at age 27, I still don’t know how to budget. You know what else completely blindsided me? Taxes. Especially taxes for someone who is self-employed. I remember speaking to my accountant for the first time and being completely overwhelmed by the information I was getting. It was at least a year’s university curriculum equivalent over one phone conversation. To say I was confused is the understatement of the century.

There’s so much more to finances than taxes. Savings, loans, investments, credit scores, mortgages, etc, are all things we deal with so regularly, yet know so little about.

Negotiation
Everyone should be taught how to negotiate, whether you choose to work for yourself or as part of an organization. What I mean by negotiation isn’t a Shark Tank type situation. I mean being able to ask for your salary expectations during an interview, not being afraid to ask for more money, and knowing what the norms are when it comes to salaries. And for business owners and freelancers, the ability to state your worth and unashamed to ask for it is a skill we all need to learn. It’s an area I wish I were better educated on.

Hormonal Health
My first foray into educating myself on hormonal health happened in January 2018, thanks to a book called Woman Code… at age 26. This is completely unacceptable. While in university, getting a prescription for birth control is easier than buying a textbook, yet we’re taught so little about what the repercussions are. In fact, forget repercussions, we’re not even taught exactly what birth control pills do!

Considering the fact that our hormones completely dictate how our bodies function, it’s shocking that we know so little about them. We should be educated about our hormones in order to take control of our health.

Mental Health
Although there’s progress being made in this area, there’s still a long way to go. Growing up, this is a topic that was so stigmatized. We were never taught the symptoms of different mental health disorders and how to deal with them. Never were we told that you’re allowed to not feel 100% all the time, or that it’s perfectly healthy to see a therapist. There was no talk about how to care for your own mental health if someone close to you is suffering from a mental health problem. Why work life balance is important for mental health, and how sleep and diet so closely impact our cognitive functions.

There’s so much to this topic, and we need to do better for the generations after us. In my mind, there is no difference between going to a doctor for a sprained ankle and going to a therapist for depression. Health problems need to be addressed, and our minds are just as important as our bodies.

Sexuality
Thankfully, so much progress has been made in this area, but personally, my education on sexual health was incredibly limited. I remember sitting through one, maybe two sex ed classes, where we were taught about condoms. There was no discussion on STDs, sexual orientation, contraceptives, both partners taking responsibility for sex, or frankly, anything related to sexual health.

Needless to say, this topic is extremely important. Both in terms of our health and wellbeing, along with knowing what is and isn’t acceptable. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about because everyone deals with sex at one point or another, and it’s just smart to be educated on everything that falls under this umbrella.

Drugs
I’ve never been one to dabble in drugs – the most I ever did was smoke pot, and I never touched it after my first semester of college. I don’t react well to alcohol, let alone anything beyond that. But, I’ve seen far too many people I care about fall prey to addiction due to stigma and lack of proper education around drugs. Because of its taboo nature, all I remember being taught about drugs is how bad they are for you.

However, it’s unrealistic to think that just because drugs are bad, no one will ever touch them. We were never taught the science behind why exactly they’re ‘bad’. Or what repetitive use may do to someone. And most importantly, what personality types should stay away from all drugs. Sure, drugs are addictive, but they fall on a spectrum. More importantly, some people are more prone to addiction than others. Because of the stigma around drugs, so many people who are now addicts, didn’t have anyone to speak to about their initial experience. I just wish there was more education and less stigma around this topic.

Career
‘When I grow up, I want to be…’, a phrase that’s used from such a young age, that by the time we graduate from college, we’re expected to just know what we want to do for the rest of our lives. But what if we don’t know exactly what we want to do?

Although I’ve always been a very creative person, I studied pre-law courses in college, thinking I could maybe go into law school if all else failed. However, I wanted to be a chef. Thankfully, I had very supportive parents, so during my last year of college, I applied to culinary school and got in. However, before accepting the offer, I had the good sense to work in a kitchen, only to realize I hated it.

I remember feeling so shattered after this realization dawned upon me. I knew I didn’t want to go to law school, I knew I didn’t want to go to culinary school… so what did I want to do?

Being a natural problem-solver, I did a ton of research into creative fields that I was interested in. In college, I was the Social Chair at my residence, so I figured maybe fashion PR or event planning was what I wanted to get into, and then from there, I went to fashion school to brush up on my credentials. I then did an internship in PR, realized that my passion lay in writing, and got a job at Elle while working on Icing & Glitter. And now I’m here.

The reason I’m sharing this story is to show you how my career path changed so drastically over 5 years, and that those feelings of confusion are completely normal. I wish that school had taught me that not knowing exactly what you want to do is okay, and that I’d eventually figure it out. I also wish that I’d known about the breadth of career opportunities that were available to me. There are so many out of the box careers (like content creator, for example), that just weren’t ever discussed in school.

What do you wish you’d learned in school?

Photography by Bekky Lonsdale